Gift for sweetestdrain by chaila (Luther)

[fv_poster]

Title of vid: The Crow
Recipient: sweetestdrain
Vidder: chaila
Fandom: Luther (2010)
Music: The Crow by Dessa
Summary: Crow took me by the shoulder and he told me, "honey, don't let go."
Content notes: Theme of self harm; suicide attempt and ideation
Signed length: 03:54

Link to signed vid post.

Lyrics
That old crow came back today
Sitting in my window like a prophet
Out on the fire escape, to say
Anger is just love, left out, gone to vinegar
You wake up a stranger to yourself then you
Learn to live with her
Sit in her clothing 'til you fill out her figure
You know life's no bella telanovela
The tightrope bows with your weight in the center
The slide show don't put all the pictures together
You try to do it right though
Right though, until you let the kite go
Death and romance, the riddles of our lifetimes
Trying to get a slow dance, middle of a knife fight
You get up and you, you give blood
Even on a good night even on a good night out

You send signal, you listen for an echo
At the first splinters you run to tell Geppetto
And in the worst winters the whole thing feels untenable
Crow took me by the shoulder
And he told me honey, don't let go

Nobody fears the height, you all just fear the fall
Go to the edge sometime
And prove your body wrong
You land badly, but you crash standing
You land badly, but you crash

He took me to the workshop
Showed me where he built the bodies
A blacksmith, a mason, a carpenter
And in the darkroom, where the whole assembly started
All the clotheslines where the hearts hung to harden
You come as fragile, soft machines
And you're bound to fast, you're bound to grieve
But you're built to balance on two feet
So why you living this last year from your knees

Oh please put me down again
Oh please put me down
Please put me down

I know you lost a bet
You had to catch your breath
But when the worst relents
You learn to live on less
You learn to live on less
You learn to live on less
You learn to live on less
You duck some, you take some square
Your luck runs out, you're there in midair
And when the big one comes
You'll know by the snare roll
You can be too careful
Ignore all the scarecrows

Time flies like the crow does
No regard for the grid
I can't ask you to show love
But would it kill you if you did?

Time flies like the crow does
No regard for the grid
I can't ask you to show love
But would it kill you if you did?

Nobody fears the height, you all just fear the fall
Go to the edge sometime
And prove your body wrong
You land badly, but you crash standing
You land badly, but you crash

Comments

[some_stars]

I've actually never seen Luther, but I love Dessa so I had to watch this, and it's incredible. It builds bit by bit so compellingly, and the climax and end are just breathtaking.

[chaila]

Thank you! I'm glad you liked it, as a fan of the song. There are so many Dessa vids already, but it was really just too perfect. Thanks for watching!

[silverhare]

This was excellent.

[chaila]

Thank you!

[goodbyebird]

Oh yes I like this!

[chaila]

Thanks! :)

[runawaynun]

Ahhhhh! This captures the beautiful fucked upness of this show. :D

[chaila]

Ahhh it is so beautiful and fucked up! <3 Thanks! :D

[mumblemutter]

This was so. completely. mesmerizing.

I have no words left, I'm just shaking on the inside with how perfect this was. There are a thousand little details I want to point out, but for now: 2:20-2:30, the shots of Gray and Justin and Jenny looking at Luther interspersed with the Russian roulette scene, oh my god that just gutted me. I will re-watch this many times once I have my breath back. (Also, this sooooooooong. *hands*)

[chaila]

*flail hands* This soooooong. Thank you so much! I love the show and John a lot, so I'm happy this did them justice. Rewatching is the absolute highest form of flattery! <3

[faith_girl222]

this was amazing! ♥

[chaila]

Thank you! <3

[lithiumdoll]

Wow. So I'm going to go watch Luther, just so I can really appreciate the vid - although it's amazing even without the context. So, so fantastic in every way!

[chaila]

Yay! Thanks! I'm glad this worked without context, and even gladder if it interested you in the show! :D It's super intense, and I like it a lot. (WATCH LUTHER VID LUTHER)

[tabaqui]

Wow, wow. That was just - wrenching. I don't watch this show, but now i'm *going* to. Wow.

[chaila]

Thank you! I'm glad it was effective without knowing the show, and yay for watching Luther! :D

[catwalksalone]

Wow. Just...Wow. That was utterly incredible and hit you in the gut painful. What a perfect match of canon and song. So, so fucked-up with almost all the hope stripped out except for those tiny glimpses at the end. God. That's going to stay with me.

[chaila]

Thank you so much! I'm glad the song worked. And ugh, yes, that is exactly the show; almost all dark and hopeless, except for the small parts when maybe not, which just makes it all the more effective. Thanks for watching!

[isagel]

I have no words for how amazing this is. The song choice! Dessa! The absolutely genius use of overlapping imagery to illustrate John's teetering on the edge of suicide! The way you lift those suicidal tendencies up into the light, how the entire vid is about that. I just. Oh my god. You are the best, festividder! *hearts vid endlessly*

Dammit, I can't get over the wedding ring on "riddles of our lifetime". And everything you do with the black hole painting. And every part of the "I can't ask you to show love" sequence, but especially the Mark bit and the final shot with Alice there-and-not-there. Ngh. Sosososososo good, in every single clip choice and cut and fade and YES. THANK YOU.

[chaila]

*flail hands* Thank you so much! Dessa! I am all aflail that you got it so completely. I had this idea in mind, but when I actually started making it, the theme started earlier and ran even more consistently throughout the show than I remembered, so I had a lot of internal flail. It's such a central tension of his character, I think, that he is so offended by the taking of life and also at least subconsciously teetering on the edge of suicide. Show!

The song was amazing, but lyric matching was kind of fiddly, so I'm glad they worked for you! (My heart flutters on Alice there-and-not-there, I won't even lie). Thanks for watching and for this awesome comment. <3

[ghanimasun]

Wow this is an amazing video. Love the pace and the whole overall feel!

[chaila]

Thanks so much! This show is ridiculously viddable. :D

[frayadjacent]

Gorgeous vid!

[chaila]

Thank you!

[happydork]

Oh wow. This vid makes sense of John Luther for me in a way I never got from the show itself.

[chaila]

Thanks! That is flattering to hear. Somehow he makes a lot of sense to me (though possibly just since I got the general idea for this?) so I'm happy to pass it on! :)

[sundancekid]

Wow -- gorgeous, dark, lyrical. I LOVE Dessa, and this song is such a perfect choice for this vid.

[chaila]

Thank you! I'm happy it works for a Dessa fan, given the number of Dessa vids already in existence. The song just seemed to perfect not to do. I really wanted to do both the show and song justice, because I love them both a lot.

[echan]

Holy crap wow, this was overwhelming in all the best ways.

[chaila]

Thank you! That is flattering to hear. That's sort of how I feel about the show. :)

[franzeska]

Oh man... 3:18 on 'would it kill you if you did' is amazing.

[chaila]

Thank you! Alice Morgan is a breath-stealer. :D

[fan_eunice]

Oh my god. This is *incredible*. I am blown away. I need to be smarter to comment on this vid because it's doing so much and all of it is freaking *brilliant*. Wow, vidder. Just. Wow.

[chaila]

Wow, thanks so much! This is pretty awesome feedback, and makes me happy to hear it. :D

[ghost_lingering]

I waffled a bit about whether to watch this -- I have a hard time with explorations of suicide/suicidal ideation sometimes (always), plus I have Strong Opinions about Dessa's songs that sometimes translates into me not being able to see the vid past my associations with the music. But I decided to give the vid a try anyway and I'm glad that I did. It's a wonderful vid with lots of complex visuals that made my heart teeter on the edge of the building just like the character did. I'll have to watch it again (and again) in order to really get some of the things that you are doing, but I hope you'll forgive me if I take some time first: this is definitely one of the explorations of suicide that works for me (that resonates for me) but that also means it's too difficult for me to rewatch right away without a breather.

It also makes me want to watch the show and stay far away from the show at the same time. Which makes me ask: I know how your vid handles suicide/suicidal ideation, but how does the show handle it?

[chaila]

I totally get that, and I'm glad this worked for you anyway. Especially given your Dessa Opinions. I love both the song and show and didn't want to shortchange either one. Wanting to watch multiple times to see more things is always flattering, but I totally get that this is not the sort of vid you play on a loop. Thanks for commenting!

I already PMed you about your question about the show so I won't repeat it all, but if you have any more let me know!

[ladysorka]

Oh, wow. This is just... it's brilliant and overwhelming and makes perfect sense of his character. And the way you've portrayed everything here, just. I feel like I need to let this vid sit in my mind and think about it for awhile.

This is fantastic.

[chaila]

Thanks so much! That is just. . . everything I wanted the vid to do! I'm glad it worked for you and made you think. Thanks for watching! :)

[livrelibre]

I haven't even seen Luther and this hit me. Well done!

[chaila]

Thank you! Glad it worked even without show context!

[lacerta]

Amazing vid!

[chaila]

Thanks so much! :)